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About Darth Vader

Well, my friends call me Annie. But who am I kidding. I have no friends. I used to be pretty into robotics and racing, but my failing health keeps me from doing some of the things that I love. Except for smiting my foes. I love smiting.

I grew up on a little desert planet called Tattooine, but I moved from my hometown when I was just a boy. I had twins; a boy and a girl. But they pretty much hate me now and want nothing to do with me. I suppose that's the life of a Baby Daddy. So be it. I really don't have time for a family, what, with all the intergalactic conquests that I head up. It's hard working your way up to the top in the Galactic Empire's ranks. It's all about who you know or who you... force-choke. And, boy, do I have that one down. I'm so good at choking people that I am actually able to read the paper with one hand, and choke with the other. Meh. It's a talent, I suppose.

So aside from the daunting daily grind of work, and a few appearances in some George Lucas films,I manage to occupy the rest of my time with long walks along the beach and twice-weekly Zumba classes (don't knock it until you've tried it). I also have my pilot's license, although I don't get to fly as much as I used to. I share a common bond with Macaulay Culkin, in that we both find it extremely difficult to find work in Hollywood ever since being typecast in ultra successful back-to-back-to-back blockbuster hits. Seems like everyone's trying to be a Vader-hater these days.